With a lead in like that, you'd expect this article to be about those God-damned, Plexiglas boxes that have been randomly installed on every thermostat I've ever seen and how much they piss-me-the-hell-off.  Well, dear reader, you would be wrong.

This article is kinda like an insurance policy.  You see, we (the world) are in some pretty deep shit.  I personally see it as the perfect time for Armageddon to kick-off, but I've been wrong about that before.  But, just to be safe, I'm posting this incredibly pessimistic scenario so that, someday, I can finally get away with saying, "Told you so."

What exactly am I predicting?  THE END OF MANKIND'S REIGN OVER THIS WORLD.  Let me explain that, first of all.  How many cataclysmic asteroid/ meteoroid/celestial body impacts has this rock endured?  How many times has it's climate undergone some kind of drastic change?  After all, 99% of all the lifeforms that've ever existed on this planet are now extinct.  Sure, nuclear weapons could seriously change the face of our world, maybe even take out a few good sized chunks... but destroy it?  No.  We don't need to be afraid of blowing up the planet; we need to be afraid of wiping ourselves out.

Pretty bad, right?  How can something like that even be possible?  The odds are too long, aren't they?  Surely no one's that suicidal.  Well, if you really want the truth, you're about to have it forced down your throat (because I can't think of a more honest way of informing you).

We'll start with something obvious, 'kay?  The economy is in pretty rough shape, am I right?*  As I write this, things seem to have leveled out.  Stocks are recovering, trade is resuming, and people are still buying gasoline.  But, how long before the next unexpected drop?  How long before the bottom falls out completely?  What'll be the real-world result?

First, whom does the US conduct the majority of it's trade with?  China.  They've been more than happy to accept American dollars as payment for their products... and they've been equally happy to turn around and dump those dollars on the next chump in exchange for anything of real value they can find.  How long after the American dollar is worthless before the Chinese decide to stop playing ball?  How long before others follow suit?  Where will it end?

It won't.  And I wouldn't expect it to.

I understand that about 99.999% of the human population doesn't know how our economic system really works, and I can say with some confidence that most of them probably don't really care.  That's cool.  I've been there, too.  But, then I decided to educate myself (do my own research) instead of relying on our near-retard-level public education systems.  That 99.999% live their lives just fine without that understanding, and I can honestly say that knowing only makes my life that much more frustrating.  Every time I whip out the debit card, put money into an account, or (worst of all) pay in cash (You know, those pieces of paper and cotton fiber with pretty pictures on them that have no practical value?) I feel like I'm compromising some kind of moral standard by perpetuating this fucked-up system.  It's a serious moral dilemma that I face on a daily basis.  So, without boring the life out of you, trust me when I say our system is all kinds of jacked-up.

And even more terrifying?  It's designed to be that way.  This is no accident.  People don't fuck up this badly unless they're trying to.  Does that sound paranoid?  Of course, but, if you'll remember, any predictions that the Japanese would attack us were dismissed as paranoia... and history has a nasty way of repeating itself.

Imagine if you had complete control of an entire country's monetary supply.  Every last _____ (insert currency) in existence.  You could probably fuck people over pretty badly, right?  Well, the Federal Reserve has pretty much achieved that level of power over the American dollar.  The name itself is an outright lie.  It's not under the direct control of any branch of our federal government, and there is no physical reserve of "money".  True, the FED banks (there's 12) have massive vaults that I can only imagine are filled to the bursting point with gold, silver, precious gems, and all other manner of valuable materials (uranium included).  But, these banks will often refuse to give even guided tours of their vaults for "security reasons."  Security?  How about "because there isn't anything in there but pallets of paper money"?  Would that be a good reason to conceal the actual contents of the FED vaults?

I can only imagine the panic that would ensue if it got out that THERE IS NO RESERVE.  There is no fall-back.  There's nothing to base the value of our currency on except the governments word that it is, in fact, worth something.  That's what "legal tender" means, citizens.  They can throw you in prison for refusing to use/accept the American dollar.  I don't think the average citizen understands the implication of that because, if they did, they'd be rioting in the streets.

Moving right along, the sad state of American foreign affairs is something everyone should be crapping their drawers over.  Is North Korea really just posturing?  Are they just attempting to bluff us into giving them food and medicine?  My opinion?  It doesn't matter one way or the other.  Many people don't understand the North Korean mindset.  This is a people who have effectively lived in isolation for the last 60 years.  All they know is what they've been told by their leaders which is, basically, that they're invincible.  This is a proud people, set in their ways and defiant to the end.  They will, without a doubt, come thundering across the 38th parallel before they consider backing down, and that, dear reader, is a very bad contingency.

We've known since the 50's that the NKA's primary objective will be to take Seoul as quickly as possible, and, with South Korea's defensive plan based around maintaining the DMZ and supporting America's 2nd Infantry Division, there's really no way of stopping the North's estimated 200,000 men from reaching the Capitol without exploiting our nuclear options.  And I think we all know how that'll turn out.

While North Korea is scary, Iran is pretty bad, too.  Can this country still be saved from its self-destructive course?  Will they join the nuclear powers?  Personally, I don't think so.  Why?  Because Israel won't let them.  It really doesn't matter what we, the EU, Russia, China, or the entire UN says, all it really comes down to is whether the Israelis decide to tolerate it or not because, realistically, Israel will act first and foremost in its own best interest.  They will strike out, secure their existence, and to hell with anyone who disagrees.

And speaking of Russia and China, who out there really believes we can peacefully co-exist with either of these powers indefinitely? 

So, to re-cap, here's how it might go down:
1)  Economy collapses; America defaults on her debts to foreign powers.
2)  China stops all trade with the West.  Russia cuts off oil to Europe.
3)  N Korea sees opening; takes it.  NKA comes thundering across the 38th.
4)  America moves to back S Korea and Japan; China and Russia back NK as a way to finally expelling American influence from Asia.
5)  Nuclear weapons are detonated on the Korean Peninsula.
6)  The West is devastated by multiple nuclear attacks.  The US-UK alliance that's allowed the West to dominate most of the world is shattered leaving a power vacuum.
7)  What's left of Europe bands together against what's left of Asia to fill the vacuum.

And that's as far as I'll go.  Pretty horrifying right?

Well, there is, dear reader, one bright spot in this otherwise dark and dreary picture.  One good reason to remain calm, regardless of the circumstances.  A singular, shining moment that redeems everything else.

I'm still here. 
I'm still standing. 
And I will continue to stand on the principles that founded this Revolution...
...'til the very end.

"Well," you might say, "that's because you're a stubborn, pissed-off, inhuman, time-traveling son-of-a-bitch who's more scared by the prospect of talking to attractive women than meeting Death."  That is a good point, but like all good points, it is also irrelevant.  I don't claim to be anything less than what I am, which is a fearless, ice-cold, killing machine. 

I don't plan on being intimidated by Armageddon. 
I don't plan on being humbled in the Final Judgment. 
And I most certainly don't plan on being killed seconds into

In that hour we will either stand together as Legionnaires for Glory and the Revolution... or else die, alone and forgotten.

© 2009 by SGT Pepper

*You bet your bottom dollar I am.

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