Is there anybody you just wish would fall off the planet?

- Whoever comes up with these things.


how do you flush the toilet in public?

- With my shoe. I'm not touchin' that God damn filthy thing with my hands.


Do you wear your seatbelt in the car?

- Of course not. My truck is invincible.


Do you have a crush on someone?

- If I did, do you think I'd be likely to tell you?


Name one thing you worry about running out of: 

- Toilet paper


What famous person do you (or other people) think you resemble? 

- HAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, you were serious?


What is your favorite pizza topping?

- The blood of my enemies.


Do you crack your knuckles? 

- Only when I'm really bored... *crack*


What song do you hate the most? 

- "Party like a Rockstar."


Did just mentioning that song make it get stuck in your head? 

- My mind is constantly playing the song "American Pie."


What are your super powers? 

- I can make your head explode just by thinking about it.


Peppermint or spearmint? 

- Neither. Only faggots and Marines chew gum.


Where are your car keys?

- Kyle's got 'em. I hope.


Whose answers to this questionnaire do you want to hear?

- Gunnery Sgt. Hartmann's


What’s your most annoying habit?

- Not elaborating on my plans.


Where did you last go on vacation? 

- Colorado in '99.


What is your best physical feature? 

- ... I hate these damn people.


What CD is closest to you right now? 

- What's a CD?


What color are your bed sheets?

- White. 


Would you rather be a fish or a bird? 

- I are Sailor. Hate both with great passion.


Do you talk on your cell phone when you drive? 

- I don't talk on my cellphone.


What is your favorite Harrison Ford movie?

- Indiana Jones: Raiders of the Lost Ark.


What MP3 is on your ipod?

- What is this "iPod" I hear so much about? Is it the cure for cancer?


What music will be on your ipod in a few minutes? 

- Again, I've no idea what the f*** you're talking about.


If you could kiss anyone who would it be? 

- ... next.


What do you do when no one is watching? 

- Cry.


If they made a movie about your life, what actor/actress would be you? 

- I would be me because I'm Seaman Appreantice *censored*... and you're not.


Coffee or Tea?

- Neither. They both give you cancer.


Have you ever been in love? 

- I love the Navy.


Do you talk to yourself?

- ... no.

YES.


© 2009 by SGT Pepper

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